History of EFT
Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT) is a systematic approach to couples therapy, rooted in the science of adult love (attachment). Developed in the 1980’s, EFT helps couples improve communication by understanding and responding to each other’s needs, building feelings of happiness, intimacy and deep connection.
EFT has been validated by over 25 years of empirical research as well as research on the process of change and predictors of relationship success. 70-75% of couples working with an EFT therapist go from distress to recovery. Among the research-based couple therapy approaches, only EFT demonstrates results this robust and long-lasting.
How EFT Works
When we can’t find and keep a safe, loving way connection to our partner, it hurts and our brain sounds alarms. We automatically respond by protest or withdrawal (fight or flight). Our partner then responds with their own withdrawal or protest. In this repeating pattern, we create a feedback loop of negative interactions that lead to more and more unhappiness in the relationship.
EFT is a structured approach where couples are supported to create nurturing, love and connection in their relationships. These steps help couples to:
- Slow down and organize rather than escalate and react
- Identify their negative cycle and make that their new common enemy (rather than each other)
- Find and share underlying emotions in the negative cycle
- Regulate their emotions and send clear emotional signals about their needs
- Respond in healthy, loving ways to the signals that are sent to them
- Create new, positive cycles where they can express their needs and fears
- Respond in ways that pull their partner closer
- Create the safety, trust and support desired
EFT is a collaborative, experiential model that encourages couples to be involved in the deconstructing of the negative cycle and the creation of a new, secure relationship.
Contact us today to begin to heal your relationship! 303-513-8975.